3 Steps To Healing Your Inner Wounded Child
Regardless of the childhood we've had, we all have wounds. Some big, some small and unless we do the work to heal them, they control how we respond to those in our life.
Emotional pain from childhood can affect your subconscious mind and physical health. As a child, you couldn't process an adult's intentions nor protect yourself and assert your needs. These experiences are stuck in time from whenever the child experienced them.
Through this powerful work, the inner child or wounded child will no longer run the ship. You will feel more at peace and in control of your emotions and behavior. The child within you most of all wants to know that you are not going to abandon them—that you will be there to protect and nurture them.
It is a way of receiving the nurturing that your parents were probably unable to give you at the time, because they didn’t know how to or were wounded themselves.
The intention is to express and release long-held emotions. If you do remember an abuse scenario, you may not know how to handle your changed perspective on this relationship. Avoid the impulse to confront the abuser until you’ve had time to gain strength. Many abusers, when confronted by the person they abused, deny it. The abuser is often so racked with guilt that they cannot face what they did. Of course, after they pass from the earth, they will understand the gravity of their hurtful behavior.
Until then, though, many abusers continue to deny that they actually abused anyone. In your fantasy, your abuser will apologize and become the ideal father. This is rarely what occurs, though, unfortunately.
Many abusers committed their actions while in an alcoholic blackout or while out of their minds due to drug use or a psychotic episode, so they actually may not remember the incident.
That’s why it’s important to wait and see if confrontation is the best method for you. We recommend focusing upon healing yourself rather than punishing the person who abused you.
3 Steps to Healing the Inner Child
Doing these inner child exercises is a great addition or complement to any counseling or therapy that you may already be engaged in.
1. Access your inner child. Start by asking your inner child, How are you feeling right now? What would you like me to know? It may help to have a photograph of yourself as a child beside you.
You can make the space where you do this exercise inviting to your inner child by placing toys, teddy bears, or a children’s blanket or night-light next to you.
2. Gain your inner child’s trust. In truth, that part of you may have felt abandoned, betrayed, neglected, and forgotten by you, the adult self. You may need to take a little time to gain the trust of that part of your child self.
Much like you would in a conversation with a friend who is feeling vulnerable, reassure your child that it’s safe to communicate. At first your inner child may feel that they cannot trust you because they felt ignored or suppressed for so long. Reassuring the child (yourself) that you are now there for them will help the child feel safe. It’s important that your inner child trusts your willingness to listen to, feel, see, or otherwise sense what they are experiencing.
3. Allow yourself to feel your inner child’s feelings. Allow all of your feelings to rise to the surface. You may be surprised by what comes up when you first decide to say hello to that part of yourself. Expressing with the intention of releasing is so therapeutic.
There will probably be tears of sadness, hurt, shame, and anger. Crying is always a good release, and in a short while, you’ll start feeling more compassionate toward yourself.
You may feel afraid that if you unleash your anger, you’ll lose control. You won’t. In fact, you’ll have more control once you release the built-up energy of suppressed emotions. Without an outlet, those buried feelings always bubble up in ways that aren’t pretty, so it’s important to unearth them. Your unconscious mind won’t give you more than you can handle.
Commit to doing this exercise weekly. Doing so establishes trust with the lost and abandoned aspects of yourself. Your child within begins to trust you. Your inner child begins to feel heard and understood. Make a commitment that you will never abandon yourself. That is a promise that you need to keep with yourself— that is, to take great care of yourself and your inner child
Sometimes loss moves us forward in unexpected ways. With a firm knowing that the Creator is real, no one, nothing is ever lost.
I've spent years teaching people from all over the world my spiritual philosophy of the Creator with the help of the meditation technique called ThetaHealing®.
If you know how it feels that nothing seems to be working, to want to take control of the direction of your life or that your losses are too great to overcome, then you are facing the same dilemma as many others to successfully manifest their life long dreams.
For many years, I have taught people with life issues the tools of ThetaHealing® which are simple to learn and are designed for anyone who is ready for change.
The Creator is real. The Creator helps us all.
I have dedicated my life's work to the Creator. I welcome you to discover for yourself the miracles the Creator has for you too.
I can't wait to see what you do!
Love and blessings, Leanne.
Once I held my first born for the first time, my whole perspective about the world changed in an instant. I became committed to loving fearlessly and loving large.
Every month I gave myself a challenge. I hugged strangers, performed acts of mushy, unabashed gratitude, left anonymous notes of encouragement in unexpected places, even started some Tim Hortons store pay-it-forward coffee lines and studied everything I could find about loving myself so I could know how to love others.
I learned so much during that time, but the thing that surprised me most was how much easier it was for me to turn my love outward to others but not to myself. I had no trouble texting love notes and performing random acts of kindness—until it was time to redirect that loving attention to myself. I was incredibly struggling to show myself the same sweetness and patience I found so easily to show to others.
AND here’s what I now know:
All love begins with self-love. At the center of every truly important and meaningful thing we do, there is love. It connects us to each other, the planet, the Divine and to ourselves. It fuels our bravest moments and our passion to collaborate with our communities. In the final moments of our lives, how we feel we loved will be the measure of how well we feel we lived.
So why do we find it so hard to practice self-love?
Here’s my list of three common barriers and their surprisingly easy fixes.
1. We are too judgmental
We end up focused on what we lack, holding ourselves to an impossible standard of perfection and then feeling inadequate when, inevitably, we decide we don't measure up.
2. We are feeling lost
Feeling lost is one of the worst feelings in the world, whether it’s a relationship gone stale, a job we’re no longer excited about, or just an overwhelming sense that we were meant for something more. That feeling of being motionless while all around us people are moving, doing, and accomplishing things zaps our energy and messes with our sense of self. It can lead to a feeling of helplessness.
3. We put ourselves last
We have work to do, people to care for, errands to run. We have so much to do that it becomes the last thing on our agenda to give ourselves the time we need to connect in with ourselves.
Intuition may be a becoming more mainstream topic, but it's still very misunderstood. While many of us have accepted the idea that trusting our gut instinct is one of the very best ways to make better decisions, not everyone is on board with this idea.
If you're not sure how to fully tap into your intuitive abilities, consider these three common errors that may be holding you back. I hope they help you embrace the idea that you are an intuitive Being capable of developing this innate and powerful skill. No superpowers necessary AND your life will improve!
1. Intuition does not exist
Everyday we interact with one another by talking, writing, reading, and observing. We also tap into subtle forms of energy. Have you ever had a feeling that you just didn't like someone but didn't know why? Did you know not to do something but did it anyways to find out later that it was a huge mistake? These are examples of intuition. You send and receive intuitive information every moment of your life, and you do it as naturally, effortlessly, and unconsciously.
2. Intuition is for the Psychic only
When you consider that the ability to hear messages, read others minds or see the Divine is something that we consider only psychics are able to do, think again. With practice and proper training, we all can do it. Just as those of us are naturally good at sports or music, others are naturally able to pick up on subtle information. But we all can learn to play sports, music, expand our intuition.
3. Intuition is only for the Spiritual
While it is true that most people who have highly developed their intuitive expression, do so with a keen interest in the esoteric, that doesn't make intuition solely spiritual. Instead, intuition is a form of human communication that extends from the physical to the non-physical sources of information and intelligence. It's as natural as breathing. So, for those of you who are spiritually minded, please note! You are not alone. That person next to you who does not meditate or pray everyday, could be just as in-tune to their intuition as you are. The only difference is that they may not realize it. Yet.
What did you do before you opened Leanne Martell Wellness ThetaHealing Calgary, and why did you decide to make it happen? "I was working as Microsoft Corporate Trainer. I really wanted to get into teaching something mindful, that made a difference not only to the student but also to his/her family life. But I was having a hard time finding the right modality, one that inspired me, gave me a permanent resolution to personal issues and was a safe place for me to explore my Spirit and test the limits of what I could do. I didn't want to be forced into a certain mindset of a teacher or into dogma that weren't right for me."
Leanne Martell B.Ed, CST is an intuitive coach and full-time Certificate of Science and Master ThetaHealing instructor since 2012. She teaches and coaches spiritually minded truth seekers and who want to break out of their comfort zone and create a legendary, inspired and abundant life. LOVE LIFE MORE!